I wish I could give up smoking, but it does taste so delicious.

We must recall the most important of humanity guidelines: Be polite. Being polite is possibly the greatest daily contribution everyone can make to life on Earth.

I love puffins. They are small, round gothic birds, and their babies are called pufflings.

The world is difficult and we are all breakable. So just be kind.

My core belief is that if you're complaining about something for more than three minutes, two minutes ago you should have done something about it.

When a woman says, ‘I have nothing to wear!’, what she really means is, ‘There’s nothing here for who I’m supposed to be today.

I want a Zero Tolerance policy on All The Patriarchal Bullshit.

It's always sunny above the clouds. Always. Every day on earth - every day I have ever had - was secretly sunny, after all.

When I hear women talking about how their wedding is going to be/was the best day of their life, I can’t help but think, You just haven’t taken enough MDMA in a field at 3 a.m., love.

I like a little bit of revolution. I think it's a very good hobby for a young woman. Better than squash.

Flyaway, problem hair is the enemy of feminism, and was probably invented by the Man to crush Susan Sontag.

Once you've done it with him, he won't abandon you. If he really loves you, if he's a man with a heart, he'll follow you wherever you go. If he doesn't, he isn't the man you want, is he?

Let me get lost in the mysteries of your heart.

This is how you explain how you feel: broken words and hard truths.

An oversupply of national sentiment is not the problem in Somalia. The problem is a lack of it. The problem is an oversupply of sub-sub-clannish attitude.

Reasons why members of Congress deserve a pay raise: Many big corporations are cutting back on bribes; nearly half the members have never been indicted.

I will work to restore fiscal responsibility to our country's budget and to provide for a more robust economy.

In a matriarchy men should be encouraged to take it easy, for most women prefer live husbands to blocks of shares and seats on the board.

I like to see life with its teeth out.

The feeling it gave me was an odd combination of weightless self-pity and excitement. I understood my life was meaningless, and this knowledge freed me up to accomplish absolutely anything.

Canadians are always asking the questions the rest of us are afraid to ask.