I wouldn't exactly call it 'Intelligent', but somebody has to be behind designing the human form other than just biological necessity. Why else would women have arms? Or feet? Or mouths?

I was mad when I heard The Amazing Race wasn't about white people.

I was kosher until I had my Bar Mitzvah, and I parlayed officially becoming a man into telling my father I wanted to eat cheeseburgers.

I once fisted two babies and then used the corpses as boxing gloves to fight off the grieving parents.

It's all about being a part of something in the community, socializing with people who share interests and coming together to help improve the world we live in.

In New York, we tip everyone. We tip doormen, we tip cab drivers, and we tip bartenders at the bar. You'll get quite an evil eye if you don't leave a tip at the bar.

I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don't like Arabs.

The best way to travel abroad is to live with the locals.

I don't mind it if blacks want equal rights, as long as they mean rights equal to a dog

It turns out Superman is weak to Kryptonite and horses.

Women have the right to choose what do with their own bodies. They can take it in the cooch or in the pooper. But that's where their right to choose stops, in my opinion.

I can't. You can't rewrite the past.

The key point some Christians miss is that scientific ignorance about the beginning of life, or any of life's processes, is not evidence of a god.

A grandmother's special calling is to pray and to be a fellow worker in the battle in which her children or her grandchildren are engaged.

All the wrong people are against it, so it must be right.

It scares me how fast I go from disliking to loving him, and I wonder if it’s this way for everyone.

I always like a good math solution to any love problem.

You don't win games as a coach during games. You win games as a coach before games. Players win during games, not coaches

We thought we'd be really big in Liverpool.

The human body is not an instrument to be used, but a realm of one's being to be experienced, explored, enriched and, thereby, educated.

Part of your purpose in life is to build strong and fruitful relationships with others, and your work setting is a perfect place to start.