IDLENESS, n. A model farm where the devil experiments with seeds of new sins and promotes the growth of staple vices.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

Ashes have no fear to burn in hellIn your heart's paradise angels dwellRib cage fastens all sins of the wrongYour bones will sing you mortality’s song

Sleeping is no mean art: for its sake one must stay awake all day.

Always consider your intellect to be lacking; otherwise too much faith in it surely leads to error.

In a malleable world where everything from atoms to cells is changing to match our beliefs, we're limited only by the way we think of ourselves in that world.

Do what is right... do it with honesty and vigor. Be creative - thats important. Dont follow what other people are doing.

The purpose of life is to matter and be ever mindful of the opportunities that we can both individually and collectively provide for others.

You can't do a good business with a bad person. Find the right people to work with and you can't go wrong.

Persecution is not wrong because it is cruel; but it is cruel because it is wrong.

When someone comes to you with big dreams, don't be too quick to belittle their ambition and dreams. Inspire and help them in any way you can. Even the beautiful butterfly was once a caterpillar.

God plays pranks and directs.