If I could do anything over, I'd have spent more time with my first set of children. I would have taken more quality time with them, for sure.

My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.

Pressure is playing for ten dollars when you don't have a dime in your pocket.

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.

The older I get, the better I used to be.

You're Mexican until you make money and then you're Spanish.

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.

There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray.

I don't usually purge myself by writing anything about any type of quote, so-called, relationships.

And we believe in his promises. Therefore you can never lose hope - hatikva - because if you keep hope alive, it will keep you alive.

The Christian's life should be one of thankfulness to God.

When you delete pictures of your ex off your phone, it feels lighter.

The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.

La literatura es la manera más agradable de ignorar la vida.

I want to be a designer for my time.

Consequently he who wishes to attain to human perfection, must therefore first study Logic, next the various branches of Mathematics in their proper order, then Physics, and lastly Metaphysics.

We know what we should and shouldn't put in our mouths, but in those times that pull on our souls, we revert to what's emotionally comfortable.

Whatever a leader does now sets up what he does later. And there's always a later.