If I could live in New York the rest of my life, I absolutely would, but it's also prohibitively expensive and you have to be working. New York is a lot nicer when you have a job.

Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people.

Don't judge me. I made a lot of money.

Kids do have to learn that life is a humiliating charade of endless disappointment and tragedy ultimately culminating in pain, decay, and death. My parents used to sing me to sleep with that one.

I'm capable of living in the moment. And I'm especially capable of living in the moment of sitting on my sofa and watching other people's moments.

I dislike Ted Cruz as much as the next everyone. But that's no reason to be rude to Ted's loving wife and possible hostage.

There's a danger zone if you take yourself too seriously. It's a terrible trap to fall into. I think it's the death of comedy.

It's like you can't even go on the radio anymore and condemn a whole subset of people to hell without getting some blowback.

I continue to be very shy. I think a lot of actors and performers are really weird, shy people working it out onstage. I don't know why that is.

You don't want to be glib; you want to treat every story respectfully.

I grew up an only child, so I was so much more adult. My eldest daughter is 10, and I was so much more of an adult than she is. She just doesn't care for the real world. She's not interested.

You realise you’re going to owe me dinner after this, right?”“How does McDonald’s sound?”“Inadequate.

Before you follow somebody, ask whom is he following.

Never cry for the same reason twice.

Too many U.S. adults have a heart age years older than their real age, increasing their risk of heart disease and stroke. Everybody deserves to be young - or at least not old - at heart.

Whatever you might say the object "is", well it is not.

I didn't wake up one day and say, you know, 'Supply-side economics doesn't make sense.

Shadows sometimes people don't see shadows. The Chinese of course never paint them in pictures, oriental art never deals with shadow. But I noticed these shadows and I knew it meant it was sunny.

I hope that when the time comes, I am treated with compassion and allowed to pass on to the next phase of life's journey in the manner of my choice.

A person can learn a lot from a dog, even a loopy one like ours. Marley taught me about living each day with unbridled exuberance and joy, about seizing the moment and following your heart.

We sometimes feel that we have been really understood, but it was always long ago, by someone now dead.