If I had a bookstore I would make all the mystery novels hard to find.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

Like everything in life, it is not what happens to you but how you respond to it that counts.

No great deed is done by falterers who ask for certainty.

Most American diets, even bad ones, provide more than enough calcium for bone health, especially for men.

It's something that was very interesting to me to be a part of and all of them again because of the relationship. Some of the superhero movies are better than others.

Doubting charms me not less than knowledge.

What Lily craved was the darkness made by enfolding arms, the silence which is not solitude, but compassion holding its breath.

None but tyrants have any business to be afraid.

In Montana, a policeman will pull you over because he is lonely.

The plain, unvarnished truth is, that every one of us needs the accountability that comes from formal, regular, intimate relationships with other godly people.