If I had the ability to influence people all over the world just by speaking or writing, one of my objectives would be find out how America became special and then tell everybody.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

Smile reveals the beauty of heart, which is timeless and ageless.

And the great thing about money is that it doesn’t matter when you harvest it. It’s an all-year crop.

Greatness in the making feels just like you feel right now

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.

You have a memory chip that small implanted in you,” he verified. I nodded, guessing this was somewhat worse than having cooties.

One should stick to the sort of thing for which one was made; I tried to be an herbalist, Whereas I should keep to the butchers trade.

Sometimes I don't drink so the next day I can remember having fun.

To make a good salad is to be a brilliant diplomatist - the problem is entirely the same in both cases. To know exactly how much oil one must put with one's vinegar.

We think computing ought to be like a telephone or a water tap or a light switch.