If I'm stuck, I get up from my chair and I wash windows. Or... clean the bathroom. Or vacuum the attic. There's always something to be done.

The Greeks had invented democracy, built the Acropolis and called it a day.

Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings.

A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.

There seemed to be some correlation between devotion to God and a misguided zeal for marshmallows.

All of us take pride and pleasure in the fact that we are unique, but I'm afraid that when all is said and done the police are right: it all comes down to fingerprints.

Remember that the most important thing is to try and love other people as much as they love you.

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

I started writing when I was twenty, and my first book came out seventeen years later.

Like all of my friends, she's a lousy judge of character.

A good [short story] would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit.

Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

Betrayal is common for men with no conscience.

I sometimes go to a mythical place called "workplace", where the doable is always unpassable as possible, especially when it pisses you off.

Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving.

I don't listen to weakies.

I just want to let everyone know I'm not a murderer.

...the more unlived your life, the greater your death anxiety. The more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death.

Be satisfied with your business, and learn to love what you were bred to.

I hate to look at myself in a mirror, and I never go and see films.