If I remember correctly, the most efficient campaign in modern times, in terms of burn rate, had been Obama's 2012 reelect, which I believe the number was they spent 37 cents at every dollar.

I want you to take a good, hard look at me, America, because this is exactly what you’ve got coming.

It took Jimmy Carter to give us Ronald Reagan.

Always be sexy. I salute that message.

Liberty is never safer than when politicans are terrified.

Climate change is the perfect pseudoscientific theory for a big government politician who wants more power. Why? Because it is a theory that can never be disproven.

Every candidate is going to come to you and say they are the most conservative person that ever lived.

I'm a maniac, and everyone on this stage is stupid, fat and ugly. And Ben [Carson] you're a terrible surgeon.

The essence of the conservative message should be we want a dynamic nation where anybody with nothing can achieve anything.

I've spent the past month in Washington D.C. and it is terrific to be back in America.

The last 15 years, there has been no recorded warming. Contrary to all the theories that they are expounding, there should have been warming over the last 15 years. It hasn't happened.

Well! marriage is like death, it comes to all.

Remember, to get what you've never had, you must do what you've never done. But to get what you once had, you must do what you once did.

My parents used to say to me to save. Always save. They also told me to invest in properties and to never go over your monthly allowance.

I wonder if it's possible to have a love affair that lasts forever.

Dead Air' is full of rants; it's a rant-based book. Yes, it's self-indulgence. I plead guilty; mea culpa.

Savor the little moments, son, that's my advice. They're what life is. All the little things that happen while you're waiting for something else.

I think a lot of studios today are run by women, and we are entering a time when a lot of women have evolved in Second City and Upright Citizens Brigade and wanted to become writers and comedians.

I like writing about the issues we all bump up against as we get older, but I try to present them in a fun way.

For every individual who gets killed, someone should build a school or teach a child. We really need to balance things with positivity.

The great trouble with baseball today is that most of the players are in the game for the money and that's it, not for the love of it, the excitement of it, the thrill of it.