If I were dying, my last words would be: Have faith and pursue the unknown end.

A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions.

Success. Is not the position where you are standing, but which direction you are going.

This is a court of law, not a court of justice.

My right to swing my fist ends where your nose begins.

I like to pay taxes. With them, I buy civilization.

Three generations of imbeciles are enough.

The life of the law has not been logic; it has been experience.

Certitude is not the test of certainty.

People talk fundamentals and superlatives and then make some changes of detail.

Fame is the scentless sunflower, with gaudy crown of gold; But friendship is the rose, with sweets in every fold.

What an almighty balls-up. Who snorts a wasp? No sane person snorts a live wasp. It’s like putting your hand up a tiger’s arse. - Egg

book variables, student variables, and school variables.

If you're in your 20s now, by the time you're 75, you'll be able to live 'til you're 150. By the time you're 150 you'll be able to live 'til you're 300. See you at your 1000th birthday party!

I rarely meet men in real life as extraordinary as ones on film, and rarely see women on film as extraordinary as ones I know in real life

Having power and being in a position of power can really blur your judgement, and it's not always that clear.

Jove lifts the golden balances that show The fates of mortal men, and things below.

Comedy is to force us to observe ourselves in ways that are humorous and yet, at the end of the day, that cause us enough discomfort with the status quo to make a change.

I am never going to get divorced, and that's that.

To make good use of life, one should have in youth the experience of advanced years, and in old age the vigor of youth.

I will be Chateaubriand or nothing.