If I weren't a Christian Scientist, and I saw "Trog" advertised on a marquee across the street, I'd think I'd contemplate suicide.

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.

I think that the most important thing a woman can have - next to talent, of course - is her hairdresser.

Recently I heard a 'wise guy' story that I had a party at my home for twenty-five men. It's an interesting story, but I don't know twenty-five men I'd want to invite ta a party.

If you have an ounce of common sense and one good friend you don't need an analyst.

Care for your clothes, like the good friends they are

I never go outside unless I look like Joan Crawford the movie star. If you want to see the girl next door, go next door.

Well, we can skip childhood because I didn't have any. Not one goddam moment on the Good Ship Lollipop.

Make your wardrobe as versatile as an actress. It should be able to play many roles.

Be afraid of nothing.

[To the mother of two unruly children in a restaurant after the woman said she really didn't know what to do with her children:] Have you tried infanticide?

I make you see things that aren't really there and you believe every word

The idyll ended, as idylls must.

If you aren't preparing for life like a war, you'll end up living like a prisoner of war.

Nobody understands another's sorrow, and nobody another's joy.

Don't leave you to go find your point of view and your story. You are all you have been given . . . this is who you are, and from where you ought and need to write.

Yes, polygamy is one of the relics of Adam, of Enoch, of Noah, of Abraham, of Isaac, of Jacob, of Moses, David, Solomon, the Prophets, of Jesus, and his apostles.

Though the world disregard the society of God's children now, yet there is a time coming in which they would be glad to have the least company with them.

Every chance you get you seem to hurt me more and more, but each hurt makes my love stronger than before.

A fair and generous woman is (at best) respected, but seldom loved.

Your only gain is to try to get me to fall down to your level. Man, you worser than devils.