If Michael Jordan was a damn plumber, he couldn't get a date. Any guy got $500 million looks good.

My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character.

The older I get, the faster I was.

I don't know anything about Angola, but Angola's in trouble.

I don't care what people think. people are stupid.

We don't need refs, but I guess white guys need something to do.

I always laugh when people ask me about rebounding techniques. I've got a technique. It's called just go get the damn ball.

Poor people have been voting for Democrats for the last 50 years and they're still poor.

They run like deer, jump like deer and think like deer.

There's only 5 real jobs in the world. Teacher, fireman, policeman, doctor and somebody who is in the armed service. If you don't have one of those 5 jobs, you shouldn't take your life that serious.

I don't believe professional athletes should be role models. I believe parents should be role models.

Don't you ever get tired of believing, Madame? Don't you ever want proof?

And so she cut out her heart and offered it as a sacrifice. She would pay whatever price her mother Wallachia demanded.“Make me prince, ” she said without feeling.

Complacency kills. Paranoia is the reason I’m still alive.

God - but a word invoked to explain the world.

I laugh at weird times - at good and bad things alike. I laugh simply when things are incongruous. It's not necessarily a judgment - as it is noticing the oddity of something.

I don't mind how many letters I receive from one who interests me as much as you do. The receptive part of correspondence I can carry on with much alacrity. It is writing answers that I groan over.

They wanted me to lead these young players, teach them the way to compete, when the only thing I should be worried about is how I'm performing in the game.

Here I am with a seriously hunky guy and I'm covered in demon pee. Why does the universe hate me?

Publicity can be terrible. But only if you don't have any.

What you do off the job is determining factor in how far you will go on the job.