If after reading this book you come to my home and brutally murder me, I do not blame you.

Greg: Scott, great horde.My realization was that I could never *actually* live a life where I had to be constantly doing things like praising a dude's horde.So that made me feel better about myself.

Girls like good-looking guys, and I am not very good-looking. In fact, I sort of look like a pudding

I am the Thomas Edison of conversational stupidity.

But a movie doesn't have to be good if it has Hugh Jackman.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship

Presence and AbsenceA certain person may have, as you say, a wonderful presence: I do not know. What I do know is that he has a perfectly delightful absence.

Demographics is destiny

Excellence is not a success but a persistent pursuit of perfection.

A library is thought in cold storage.

I see myself as a recovering journalist.

A child needs your love most when he deserves it least

Not fat, just not anorexic. She's soft in all the right places.

My mom smiled at me. Her smile kind of hugged me.

True prosperity can only come from a healthy economy and sound money. That can only be achieved in a free society.