If camping is so great, why are the bugs always trying to get in your house?

The appetizer is just an excuse for an extra meal. Let's see, I will start with the eighty buffalo wings.

Yeah the appetizer, that's the food we eat before we have our food...No no you're thinking of dessert, that's food we eat after we have our food.

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.

Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.

I talk kinda slow, especially for the Northeast, so it was a way to beat [would-be hecklers] to the punch.

My favorite vegetable is the marshmallow.

The only advantage to wearing glasses is that you can do that dramatic removal.

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.

One of the benefits of eating salad is that you can eat tons of it and never be satisfied.

In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.

If it is only one thing in life that you have or allowed to discover, then it must be your significance.

I feel a thrill of excitement at this first tiny glimpse of self-revelation, of intimacy.

Loving yourself means being your own best friend, standing by yourself at all times, including times of failure; being there for yourself no matter what.

American writer 1803-1882 Play is our brain's favorite way of learning.

whatever the uses of a room, they are seriously interfered with if it be not preserved as a world by itself.

I'm usually pretty reserved, but I really couldn't hold myself in because I was so excited for these guys.

Say exactly what you mean. Enough said.

The Lord heareth the prayers of those who ask to put aside hatred. But he is deaf to those who would flee from love.

Failure is never quite so frightening as regret.

LIFE + DESIRE = MAN; LIFE - DESIRE = GOD.