If contemporary literary fiction doesn't read a bit like science fiction then it's probably not all that contemporary, is it

You're miserable, edgy and tired. You're in the perfect mood for journalism.

Scotch whisky is made from barley and the morning dew on angel's nipples.

If you believe that your thoughts originate inside your brain, do you also believe that television shows are made inside your television set?

Read comics. All comics. And then cut them open to steal their power.

I want a tattoo over my heart that reads TRY HARDER YOU LAZY PARAMEDIC SHITBAG OR I WILL HAUNT YOUR BEDROOM FOREVER

That means that the universe is two-dimensional. Matter, energy, time, you, me and the floor are holograms.

The single simplest reason why human space flight is necessary is this, stated as plainly as possible: keeping all your breeding pairs in one place is a retarded way to run a species.

Wolves ate even mighty hunters, for there was no honor or code among predators, and everyone's guts steam the same way when torn open on a cold night.

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!

What if I left my memory in the future and I have to catch up to it?

Not being treated as equal IS oppression

Whether or not Americans supported George W. Bush, they could not avoid learning about Abu Ghraib.

Children learn how to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions.

I'm after something far more esoteric than a virginal shag. Though, if you'd like, darlin', I'm certainly up for the task.

I am rough around the edges, and I am not a polished girl.

All punishment is mischief; all punishment in itself is evil.

Any movement in history which attempts to perpetuate itself, becomes reactionary.

If you don't go within, you go without.

The principle of faith is as firm as the very pillars of heaven.

A virtuous and a Christianlike conclusion-- To pray for them that have done scathe to us.