If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

Without change there is no gain, but every change brings some pain.

I get airsick just licking an airmail stamp.

Sometimes you kind of lose yourself in someone else's personality.

Stillness is the ruler of haste.

The musical heritage of Yorkshire is deep and wide.

I've always been interested in the rest of the world. My family is very eccentric; my parents have always been very supportive of travel and doing whatever I thought I needed to do.

There is the will of the people, there is the will of the mind! Always be at the side of the second one! The first one contains mostly stupidity; the second one contains always intelligence.

Heroes? Vietnam Vets are heroes. The guys who tried to rescuse our hostages in Iran are heroes. I'm just a hockey player.

The world of books: romantic, idle, shiftless world so beautiful, so cheap compared with living.

You can't control what you can't measure