If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

The idea that the future is unpredictable is undermined every day by the ease with which the past is explained.

Vengeance cannot abide the agony of grace.

Thin people are beautiful but fat people are adorable.

There's a trick to the Graceful Exit. It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, a relationship is over - and to let go. It means leaving what's over without denying its value.

Men and girls, men and girls: Artificial swine and pearls.

Wealth is the least trustworthy of anchors.

Like a tongue on frozen steel, like flesh in flame —

The object becomes aesthetically significant when it becomes metaphysically significant.

I've never supported this concept of going after Napster. I think the rock bands who fought this were wrong.

A king is a man strong of character and conviction who leads by example and truly cares for the suffering of his people,not a brute who rules simply because he is the strongest.