If olive oil comes from olives, then where does baby oil come from?

Delusions of grandeur make me feel a lot better about myself.

Unless you are at a picnic, life is no picnic.

I have gained and lost the same 10 pounds so many times over and over again my cellulite must have deja vu!

The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.

It's my belief we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way.

I worry that our lives are like soap operas. We can go for months and not tune in to them, then six months later we look in and the same stuff is still going on.

One thing I have no worry about is whether God exists. But it has occurred to me that God has Alzheimer's and has forgotten we exist.

I worry that humanity has been "advanced" to its present level of incompetency because evolution works on the Peter Principle.

You don't know what it's like! Hyperactive twins! When they turned three, my doctor prescribed Ritalin -- I wouldn't dream of giving a drug to my children, but it does help when I take it myself.

Bible study without Bible experience is pointless. Knowing Psalm 23 is different from knowing the shepherd.

May the Lord revive and restore you to good health.

The habit of compromising is the only tested and proven path to a happy relationship and marriage.

Atheism is a disease of the mind caused by eating underdone philosophy

When the outlook is steeped in pessimism, I remind myself, "Two and two still make four, and you can't keep humankind down for long."

Human beings are such knotted, desperate pieces of work-it's a rare thing to know one completely, to the core, and still love him.

It's a Renaissance, or put more simply, some you win, some you lose

It's fun to deal with the terror and the huge highs and lows of things. We're still getting massive surprises, anytime there's any Twilight-related event or anything.

We need to help those we seek to serve, to know for themselves that God not only loves them, but He is ever mindful of them and of their needs.

In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!