If people think nature is their friend then they sure don't need an enemy.

There is a tragic flaw in our precious constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.

Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before.

Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.

Being a Humanist means trying to behave decently without expectation of rewards or punishment after you are dead.

One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.

A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved.

Here we are, trapped in the amber of the moment. There is no why.

Music is, to me, proof of the existence of God. It is so extraordinarily full of magic, and in tough times of my life I can listen to music and it makes such a difference.

Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.

We have to continually be jumping off cliffs and developing our wings on the way down.

A GOOD man values his INTEGRITY and CHARACTER. NEVER deal with one that has no SELF RESPECT!

Now it was just the two of us, Max and me. And about a thousand other people around us.

He’s jealous because lions are better hunters.”--Monroe “Are you compensating for something, Monroe?” --Bastian

I talk to my typewriter and that is what I've been working on for 40 years-how to write for talking.

Immigration without assimilation is an invasion.

He slips . . . but manages to regroup himself.

Some kids dream of joining the circus, others of becoming a major league baseball player. I have been doubly blessed. As a member of the New York Yankees, I have gotten to do both.

At the beginning of a love affair, not even the neurotic is neurotic.

If I don't believe it, I don't care.

The only way I could get comfortable around people was to make them laugh.