If there was two birds sitting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly first.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

The practice of forgiving is a sequential practice that begins with excusing someone.

Words make you think. Music makes you feel. A song makes you feel a thought.

I've been addicted to TV since I emerged from the womb.

I'm clean and sober for over a year and no one seems to care! They're like, 'Oh, her dramatic weight gain.' So, stop making fun of me!

Where you are today is the sum of every choice you've ever made. If you don't like where you are, start making different choices!

I get angry about stuff, I get very emotionally intense about stuff and that's how I get it out - with books, with the band, on my own onstage, but it's always kind of a wail.

The giving up of (a belief in) witchcraft is in effect the giving up of (a beilief in) the Bible.

I definitely think women are running it right now. We are not afraid to speak our minds. It's exciting because that's what I stand for, for people to be irreverent and to be themselves.

Surely, God on high has not refused to give us enough wisdom to find ways to bring us an improvement in relations between the two great nations on earth.

Western people often see obscenity where there is only symbolism.