If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

Instead of imposing new obligations, (Christians) should appear as people who wish to share their joy, who point to a horizon of beauty and who invite others to a delicious banquet.

You can either learn to live with your Kryptonite or you can conquer it. Do what others don’t and you will have a distinct strategic advantage.

Even the darkest and stormiest sky will give way to a bright and beautiful sun.

Active prospecting let's people know that they matter

When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.

There's nothing that makes you so aware of the improvisation of human existence as a song unfinished. Or an old address book.

Self-respect and a clear conscience are powerful components of integrity and are the basis for enriching your relationships with others.

In relation to the question of hope, I think the only hope we have is hope against hope. We hope for a better world. But of course we can do better than just hope.

Man, wear your seat belts. That's all I can tell everybody. You never know.