If, with the literate, I am Impelled to try an epigram, I never seek to take the credit; We all assume that Oscar said it.

Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.

Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.

I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.

Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.

If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.

Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.

I am a Smedry, and we do ridiculous, unexpected, eccentric things like this all the time! Ha-ha!

Just getting to talk to that person [Woody Allen ] in real life was pretty wild.

I wish you would read a little poetry sometimes. Your ignorance cramps my conversation.

When you approach intuitive methods with respect, you become open to hearing from your interior channels.

We started out covering income inequality in the magazine [Mother Jones], but that ongoing body of work positioned - and sourced - us well to put both Occupy and the 47 percent in context.

So many of the loveliest things in England are melancholy.

As a cure for the cold, take your toddy to bed, put one bowler hat at the foot, and drink until you see two.

The test of a preacher is that his congregation goes away saying, not "What a lovely sermon!" but "I will do something."

I was a pretty confident kid, even if it was all false bravado.

I would catch sight of some flawless man off in the distance, but as soon as he moved closer I immediately saw he wouldn’t do at all.