If x is the population of the United States and y is the degree of imbecility of the average American, then democracy is the theory that x times y is less than y

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.

Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

Anger precedes hate, while love vicariously hangs in the balance.

The only permission, the only validation, and the only opinion that matters in our quest for greatness is our own.

When you aren't open to grow

The problem is that we always look for the missing piece of the puzzle instead of finding a place for the one in our hand...

Hope is the first thing to take some sort of action.

In giving you are throwing a bridge across the chasm of your solitude.

There is a difference between a person who is dying and a person who is suicidal. I do not want to die. I am dying.

A good apprentice cook must be as polite with the dishwasher as with the chef.

Especially being a woman of color, sometimes it's hard for to put our foot down. You work with a lot of men, and they'll be like, "She has Joyner the best reputation".

Quiet through the grave go I; or else beneath the graves I lie