If you are a Christian, you are free to think that all these religions, even the queerest ones, contain at least some hint of the truth.

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.

Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.

I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.

It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

There's no such thing as being too Southern.

The game of life is a lot like football. You have to tackle your problems, block your fears, and score your points when you get the opportunity.

Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing.

It's better to have died a small child than to be a politician who gets caught in a scandal during a slow news month.

You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, 'What's in it for me?'

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

Learn to read and a whole new world will open up to you.

Every creature is better alive than dead, men and moose and pine trees, and he who understands it aright will rather preserve its life than destroy it.

Necessity is the mother of all invention.

A lot of 18-year-olds are like old men. They think they've seen everything.

That question in marriage is mutual submission, really - the next verse goes on: "husbands love your wife as Christ loves the Church."

Chefs are nutters. They're all self-obsessed, delicate, dainty, insecure little souls and absolute psychopaths. Every last one of them.

If you tell a novelist, 'Life's not like that', he has to do something about it. The poet simply replies, 'No, but I am.'

Necessity, who is the mother of our invention.

There are few takers for the quiet heart.