If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

Don't watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.

The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.

If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.

Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.

It's a good thing that when God created the rainbow he didn't consult a decorator or he would still be picking colors.

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.

You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.

Siblings: children of the same parents, each of whom is perfectly normal until they get together.

We may not always see eye to eye, but we can try to see heart to heart.

When someone can love without judging, he is truly wise.

Happiness comes from striving to make tomorrow better than today and being at peace when yesterday was better than today as well.

Mystic: a person who is puzzled before the obvious but who understands the non-existent.

I am putting together a secular bible. My Genesis is when the apple falls on Newton's head.

I really do work in solitude.

Life is movement. Once you stop moving, you're dead. Choose life.

Sometimes you got to get sick before you can feel better.

Horizontality is a desire to give up, to sleep. Verticality is an attempt to escape. Hanging and floating are states of ambivalence.

Individuals score points, but teams win games.