If you find yourself born in Barnsley and then set your sights on being Virginia Woolf it is not going to be roses all the way.

Sometimes there is no next time, no time-outs, no second chances. Sometimes it’s now or never.

Life is rather like a tin of sardines - we're all of us looking for the key.

All knowledge is precious whether or not it serves the slightest human use.

History is a commentary on the various and continuing incapabilities of men. What is history? History is women following behind with the bucket.

A bookshelf is as particular to its owner as are his or her clothes; a personality is stamped on a library just as a shoe is shaped by the foot.

If you think squash is a competitive activity, try flower arranging.

The majority of people perform well in a crisis and when the spotlight is on them; it's on the Sunday afternoons of this life, when nobody is looking, that the spirit falters.

Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall.

I saw someone peeing in Jermym Street the other day. I thought, is this the end of civilization as we know it? Or is it simply someone peeing in Jermyn Street?

Above literature?' said the Queen. 'Who is above literature? You might as well say one was above humanity.

Here's a tip for new parents: Start lowering those expectations early, it's going to pay off later.

The very best and the very worst of life will come from [their] ability to love strangers.

Just hold me please,” she replied. I’d hold her forever if I could.

Always look for your lost ones in trashcans.

The thing I know for sure is that at the end of my life, what I'm going to remember is the love I felt for my family and my friends, and whatever good I did for other people.

Television is the box they buried entertainment in.

I always like to see a person stand up to a golf ball as though he were perfectly at home in its presence.

Art is eternal for it reveals the inner landscape which is the soul of man.

Don't cut it," he said gruffly. "But no one'll see my tattoos if I don't." "Wear it up." -Dimitri, Rose, Dimitri

If it turns out that Mario doesn't really fit into the type of game I want, I wouldn't mind using Zelda as the basis of the new game.