If you have any problems at all, don't hesitate to shut up.

Humor is basically a cognitive process. And it's a creative process not only on the part of the cartoonist but on the part of the viewer.

There is no Algorithm for Humor

While the end-of-the-world scenario will be rife with unimaginable horrors, we believe that the pre-end period will be filled with unprecedented opportunities for profit.

Im pretty adept with computers and Photoshop for my blog, and I found my style with a conversational voice and an image-ready column.

I do find that humor helps in relationships. It certainly helps in my marriage now because I'm a very, very fallible person. And if I wasn't funny I'd be kicked right out the door.

The digital realm give cartoons and cartoonists more possibilities for exposure.

There is humor that's just whimsy, that we smile at, but the humor that we laugh at, someone has to be - someone's dignity has to be reduced.

Each cartoon needs the right amount of wrong.

There are no cartoons about happy marriages.

Humor levels the playing field. I understood that early on - that was something I had.

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he was evil.

You can use logic to justify just about anything, that's its power and it's flaw.

Every person I have known who has been truly happy has learned how to serve others.

I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.

I was always crazy even before the drugs.

All the great truths are basically trivial and so we have to find new ways, preferably paradoxical ways, of expressing them, in order to keep them from falling into oblivion.

Thus we should beware of clinging to vulgar opinions, and judge things by reason's way, not by popular say.

When I was small, I would refuse to drink when I ate fish because I thought the fish would reconstitute itself in my stomach

I'm a competitor. I never doubt myself.

When you build a bridge, you insist that it can carry 30,000 pounds, but you only drive 10,000-pound trucks across it. And that same principle works in investing.