If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

Short questions with long answers, my boy.

I think a primal role of a man in a relationship is to protect his woman.

If we do not try, we will not know.

I took a good deal o' pains with his eddication, sir; let him run in the streets when he was very young, and shift for hisself. It's the only way to make a boy sharp, sir.

Winning is important, but survival is even more important. If you don't survive, you don't get to fight the next battle.

All this improvement is great, but all that does is get us in the game to play for improvements that we need in the future, so that we can be aggressive in the marketplace.

Great is the art of beginning, but greater is the art of ending.

I came to poetry because I felt I couldn't live properly in the real world.

I always go extreme ways.

Perpetrators who receive the gift of forgiveness are given a chance to change