If you smell something, say something.

You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled by cases of police overreach.

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!

We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea.

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.

I've always liked Atlanta. And not just for the strip clubs, but the shopping and the food.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

I really like to put my name on everything, so my roommate doesn't steal it. It's really a throwback to that.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.

Leadership and learning are indispensable to each

One must not align himself with the beliefs that limit his thinking

Throw an idea into the world and its impact will ripple and reverberate beyond your side of the shore.

A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive. Having been alive it won't be so hard in the end to lie down and rest.

I'm an angry person, angrier than most people would imagine, I get flashes of anger. What works for me is working out when it's useful to use that anger.

Politicians are like God. No one believes in them, they haven't done anything for ages, and they give jobs to their immediate family

Whoever desires to purify his heart, then let him prefer Allah to his desires

My mum Mary was always a bright, confident and fiercely independent lady.

Humor is not a mood but a way of looking at the world.

I hate love. Hate being in love. I never want it to happen to me again.