If you take the time to study how to be a doctor and how to use your scalpel and your medicine, then there are endless beings out there to help.

The answer lies within ourselves. If we can't find peace and happiness there, it's not going to come from the outside.

Meditation is for you to realise that the deepest nature of your existence is beyond thoughts and emotions, that it is incredibly vast and interconnected with all other beings.

If we greet situations with a positive attitude, we will eventually create positive returns. If we respond with a negative attitude, negative things will eventually come our way.

In the very deep darkness of this world, little pinpoints of light show up very brightly and can shine a long way.

Our pure awareness is not male or female.

The first thing is to learn how to quiet the mind, relax the mind, and bring the awareness to the front so that we are conscious of what we're doing when we're doing it without all the commentary.

Develop confidence in your innate qualities and believe that these qualities will be brought to fruition.

The Buddha himself said, "I still use conceptual thinking, but I'm not formed by it." And that's the Buddha.

Even if one isn't a committed Buddhist, it just helps us become better human beings.

We have produced many of our problems through our confused mental states.

When someone else doesn’t believein you or your dreams, rememberit’s about them, not you.

I'm not the guy to ask about politics. I'm a gag writer.

It's quite nice when you've been generally dissed about your irrelevancy and then suddenly have people coming on bended knee and saying we need you to come back.

Can somebody explain to me why Pepsi and Coke advertise? Are we missing something? Seriously, everyone in this room has drank enough Pepsi and Coke in their lifetime they could piss it for a week.

Slice him where you like, a hellhound is always a hellhound.

I giggle when I put myself down. It's just funny to me.

Do not waste your time on light, weak, milk­toast ministries and books

I love all of the Earth.

I did a series called Ned and Stacey for two years for Fox back in the 90s. I was writer on it as well as a producer, and it was very important to me that there were no contemporary references.

The fact is that when you talk about Mujib [Rahiman], everything seems so incredible. I don't understand how the world can take him seriously.