If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in love as they are in debt.

Always remember, money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense.

One way to get high blood pressure is to go mountain climbing over molehills.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking.

You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice his bills are neatly typewritten.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't.

Today, there are three kinds of people: the haves, the have-nots, and the have-not-paid-for-what-they-haves.

Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

Restyle your life forever by empowering yourself to incite the greatness in you

One minute with a silent spirit of self-knowledge is enough to align you to put smiles on the face of the boring world. The world needs you! Yes it does!

Now that I look back on it, having retired from being a reporter, it was kind of romantic. It was a wonderful way to live one's life, just as I imagined it would be when I was 6 or 7.

I love metaphor. It provides two loaves where there seems to be one. Sometimes it throws in a load of fish.

Find a client and get a job.

I don't even have cable anymore, or a television. I just watch on computers. It's clearly the future of where we're heading.

There are strange hells within the minds war made.

Poker would have never gotten on TV when we only had three networks.

Hillary Clinton doesn't command the screen. She doesn't look intimidating, inviting, engaging.

The world is shrinking together; it is finding itself neighbor to itself in strange, almost magic degree.