If you treat an animal right, they don't run away. They're not like us. They run away from people they don't trust; most times we run away from ourselves.

You know, we all have our inner demons. I, for one - I can't speak for you, but I'm on the verge of moral collapse at any time. It can happen by the end of the show.

What we don't have a right to is healthcare, housing, or handouts. We don't have those rights.

Girl, you better check yourself before you wreck yourself!

Good for you, you have a heart, you can be a liberal. Now, couple your heart with your brain, and you can be a conservative.

Sometimes the hardest part of the journey is believing you're worthy of the trip.

The shadows are only the darkest when the light is at its brightest.

The moment you stop worrying about success is when success will happen.

Whoever thought a tiny candy bar should be called fun size was a moron.

If you have a priest that is pushing social justice, go find another parish. Go alert your bishop.

All men are created equal. It is what you do from there that makes the difference. We are all free agents in life. We make our own decisions. We control our own destiny.

The welkin is blue yet in agony, The air and the water has made a pair, As the love was unfaithful and the earth has to suffer, until the time goes backwards.

I took it back: he didn't just hate himself down deep. He'd made plenty of room in there for me, too.

...it is more civilized to make fun of life than to bewail it.

There never was any party, faction, sect, or cabal whatsoever, in which the most ignorant were not the most violent; for a bee is not a busier animal than a blockhead.

I'm like a junkie for writing.

Kids ought to have two bicycles, one to ride and one to rent.

I'm not a "conservative" because I see precious little left in this world worth conserving. Playing defense, it seems to me, can only forestall an inevitable slide into tyranny.

No rules. Don't be afraid to do whatever you want. Cooking doesn't have to have rules. I don't like it that way.

Pakistan hasn't been cast in the role of... interesting cultural place or, you know, land of great comedians.

The fruit tasted foreign but indigenous, like sunlight a tree had changed through patience.