If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.

Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore's program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.

Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.

Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.

I made it, Ma - Carnegie Hall. And I didn't have to practice.

A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!

You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.

Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?

If you stop and think about it, nearly all great humor is at the expense of someone or something.

My father helped me leave. He said, 'It's all out there, it's not here.'

I don't mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.

Many people pray to be kept out of unexpected problems. Some people pray to be able to confront and overcome them.

Censors are energetic and righteous people but they just couldn't work a room like Abbe Lane.

If I am a great man, then all great men are frauds.

Getting revenge on a guy is just not worth it to me. I mean, it definitely sucks at the time, but obviously you're not supposed to be with that person.

Every Christian is either a missionary or an imposter.

In all we do we must cultivate faith. Increased faith is the touchstone to improved church performance.

It is commonly believed that the rights of the American people come from the Constitution. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I like on the table, when we're speaking, the light of a bottle of intelligent wine.

The greater the teacher, the greater the pupil may become.

For a while she considered being ill, but she changed her mind.