In America, Christmas is the king of all holidays. To be left out of Christmas is the ultimate minority experience.

Without my relatives, I am but a thread; together, we form a colorful and elaborate Persian carpet.

Most fruits, if left alone on a tree, eventually do ripen, especially if they're not being yelled at.

My parents are highly evolved worriers. ... If worrying were an Olympic sport, my parents' faces would have graced the Wheaties box a long time ago.

Writing is such a powerful tool. I believe everyone should be writing.

My father's motto has always been 'Room in the heart, room in the house.' As charming as this sounds, it translates into a long line for the bathroom and extra loads of laundry for my mother.

Everyone except gamblers knows that gambling never pays. ... Losing, like winning, only increased his determination to play.

Elinor Lipman is to tweets what Shakespeare is to sonnets.

For me, writing clarifies things. It gives meaning, and it makes me see the connections.

My dad always says that kindness is our religion and if we treat everybody the way we would like to be treated, the world would be a better place.

... even though we belong to three different religions. We are alike in so many more ways than we are different.

Why should any guy want to be only friends with a girl? It’s like agreeing to be near a chocolate cake and never eat it. It’s like sitting in a racing car but not driving it.

You know ... you keep doing the same things and you keep getting the same result over and over again.

Do not cry over the past mistakes. Laugh over the events in time. Make things right now.

Love is that splendid triggering of human vitality the supreme activity which nature affords anyone for going out of himself toward someone else.

Who is wiser: the man who plants flowers along life's way or the man who makes it bristle with thorns?

If I could control the behavior of fat guys I would make them ride mopeds more often.

Progress needs the brakeman, but the brakeman should not spend all his time putting on the brakes.

I'm letting no man handle my bank account.

As a poet I would say everything should be able to come into a poem but I can't put toothbrushes in a poem. I really can't.

Nemesis is one of God's handmaids.