In certain trying circumstances urgent circumstances desperate circumstances profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

I hate time. It never does what you want it to.

Your life will become more fulfilling once you realise what you have within yourself and your wardrobe - and then learn to use what you have.

The fragile nature of youth is at last hardened by the agony of experience.

In war as in life it is often necessary when some cherished scheme has failed to take up the best alternative open and if so it is folly not to work for it with all your might.

I was terrible at maths, but I could grasp science, and I used to love to read about the lives of the scientists. I wanted to be a scientist or an inventor.

I want people to see the full measure of Donald Trump.

The 60th seed at Wimbledon gets a chance at Center Court. The 60th seed in the NCAA gets a chance to go to the Final Four. But the third seed [in presidential politics] is shut out.

After 'Urinetown,' 'Avenue Q' and now 'Mormon,' is there an envelope remaining to be pushed?

Business really has to work its way back. It has to re-earn the trust of its broad sets of constituents.

Brandy is one of my favorite vocalists. Jay-Z is my favorite emcee outside of Biggie.