In dog culture, when someone calls you, you should absolutely not come if that results in the ending of something you like or initiation of something you don’t like.

When coming to making kids: Size doesn’t count, it’s sperm count that counts.

The best teachers are those that can influence even the poorest of all learners.

Emerald as heavy as a golf course, ruby as dark as an afterbirth, diamond as white as sun on the sea.

Acquire worldly wisdom and adjust your behavior accordingly. If your new behavior gives you a little temporary unpopularity with your peer group then to hell with them.

Just like music evokes emotion, so can garments.

If I don't die by Thursday, I'll be roaring Friday night.

Writing is the perfect balance between self-confidence and self-doubt, with a bit of self-delusion thrown in.

A body would think that your heart was as black as your face. People thinks now that sweeps is black all through instead of blackall over.

An addiction to distraction is the end of your creative production.

A rich, multi-dimensional tour of Naples, most brilliant, battered, and bewildering of cities, here fixed to the page with wit and élan. Splendid.