In every big city there is always one surefire laugh, and that lies in hanging some piece of idiocy upon the people of a nearby city or town.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

When words become unclear, I shall focus with photographs. When images become inadequate, I shall be content with silence.

Follow your bliss on the way to success

To go beyond samsara and nirvana, we will need the two wings of emptiness and compassion. From now on, let us use these two wings to fly fearlessly into the sky of the life to come.

When the writer has done his best, he then should proceed to do his second best.

I like dressing up for dates and dissecting a dinner conversation with a new guy to determine if he might be The One.

As is the case with all good things in life - love, good manners, language, cooking - personal creativity is required only rarely.

I believe in trusting. Trust begets trust. Suspicion is foetid and only stinks. He who trusts has never yet lost in the world.

Do not become a disciple of one who praises himself, in case you learn pride instead of humility.

Through our faith, we gain the courage to take action. And through action, we move one step closer toward the manifestation of our desires.

The Feast of Fortuna had nothing to do with tuna, which was fine with Percy.