In our world, all puns are beautiful and they are the highest form of comedy.

If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing.

Don't yell at people. Stand up for what's right. Put yourself in the other persons place. Respect women. Don't take no for an answer. Laugh at yourself. Don't believe what you are told. Fall in love.

White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.

Now, we're Americans. Technically, who is from this country? Only the Indians, who we graciously let dwell on their native casinos.

I love the nightlife. I like to boogie.

No one is a natural - you have to work at being a natural.

Honesty and unpopular opinions are the toughest sell in a country with an irony-deficiency.

We don't know anything about Scottish history. All we know is that an American guy painted his face blue and somehow they won.

I love animals. I couldn't eat a whole one but I'll split one with you if you want.

You leave white people alone in constant isolation for 2,000 years, and you know what their musical contribution will be? Riverdance!

I'm a Marketer, I don't believe in Brands, but I believe in Quality and quality has different definitions

I know. That sounds like a lie. But Presbyterians know that every so often a lie isn't all that bad, and I figured that this was about the best place it could happen.

Freud is all nonsense

Even now one rarely hears of people achieving great things unless they first stumble in some respect.

Ah fair Zenocrate, divine Zenocrate, Fair is too foul an epithet for thee.

I was not a great guitarist, so I sold my 1960 Fender Stratocaster in exchange for a Shure Microphone, made in Chicago, and a flute.

Discover the joy of giving and you will discover the reason for living.

Adversity is an opportunity for heroism.

You have no idea if your idea matters until you share it.

Lord of the Rings is a good thing for us because it opened the door for the genre in general. Ursula Le Guin's stories are very different from Lord of the Rings.