In point of morals, the average woman is, even for business, too crooked.

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything

Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so.

It may be those who do most, dream most.

I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.

A half truth, like half a brick, is always more forcible as an argument than a whole one. It carries better.

Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit

I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so.

It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.

Stupid dire warnings of imminent doom.They always put me in a bad mood.

It's a silence I know. The kind that's actually a sound so loud your brain doesn't know how to interpret it at first.

If you know what you want to do, you have the opportunity to become who you want.

There have been as great souls unknown to fame as any of the most famous.

What distinguishes a great player is his presence. When he goes on to the court, his presence dominates the atmosphere.

What embitters the world is not excess of criticism, but absence of self-criticism.

A man who is not interested in politics is not doing his patriotic duty toward maintaining the constitution of the United States.

Morrissey was my Mrs. Garrett, the house mother from the Facts of Life, a soothing adult figure giving me words of wisdom.

Once the cameras rolling or the audience is in the seats, I'm on. I can't help it. I go into a trance.