In retrospect, our triumphs could as easily have happened to someone else; but our defeats are uniquely our own.

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

It's the most unhappy people who most fear change.

A hypochondriac is one who has a pill for everything except what ails him.

It's innocence when it charms us, ignorance when it doesn't.

The head never rules the heart, but just becomes its partner in crime.

We lavish on animals the love we are afraid to show to people. They might not return it; or worse, they might.

In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.

We choose those we like; with those we love, we have no say in the matter.

They threaten me with lung cancer, and still I smoke and smoke. If they'd only threaten me with hard work, I might stop.

Pity all newlyweds. She cooks something nice for him, and he brings her flowers, and they kiss and think: How easy marriage is.

The Protestants teachings affected the view of the populace to work

What are you - Secret Service?''If I were, I wouldn't admit it.''And you're not admitting it, I notice.

No design, no matter how common or seemingly insignificant, is without its adamant critics as well as its ardent admirers.

My favorite literature to read is fairly dry history. I like the framework, and my imagination can do the rest.

Too much free time is certainly a monkey's paw in disguise. Most people can't handle a structureless life.

Slowly but surely, the older I get, the fatter I get. It just goes.

An annoyed and joyless Christian is the devil's greatest billboard.

The umbrella that I live under is that you must be truthful with everyone except when to do so would injure them or others.

Entertainers are there to entertain. They aren't there to teach your children the lessons that you haven't bothered to teach them at home yourself.