Income is the natural and rational gauge and measure of respectability.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

If you let others influence you, they will also let you influence them. But if you're only trying to teach them something, and put your ideas into people's brains, you will never succeed.

In fairy tales they all seem perfect, but really they are just as troubled as we are!

Their faces were contorted with a horror only known to those who have silenced their consciences.

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a lousy newspaper is a joy forever.

You think that just because you left, it would change how I feel? Well, guess what? You're wrong. I can't help how I feel. I'm still in-

There's a storm inside of us, a burning river, a drive. You push yourself further than anyone could think possible. You are never out of the fight.

Now a small woman, with dangerous curves. I could bite into her.

When someone critises or disagrees with you, a small ant of hatred and antagonism is born in your heart. If you do not squash that ant at once, it might grow into a snake, or even a dragon.

I never had that thing about being black. If the whole world was like that, maybe there would be more harmony and love.

Everybody else is afraid to fail. I do not really care because when I fail, I try something new.