Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents)

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

Anymore, no one's mind is their own.

I challenge you to find a more innocuous sentence containing the words sperm, suction, swallow, and any homophone of seaman. And then call me up on the homophone and read it to me.

Prosperity is no just scale

It is safer to face a strong enemy in the field of battle, than to fight a war by the side of a weak friend.

An American Family Sampler is a book any reader will find insightful, thoroughly researched, and fun to read. Robert Frump, author, award winning journalist, business leader

If you're 5-minutes early, you're late "How to always be on time

Health cannot be bought at the supermarket. You have to invest in health. You have to get kids into schooling. You have to train health staff. You have to educate the population.

I usually spend my free time worrying about when I'm going to work next.

The legislature have anxiously provided for those most useful and deserving body of men, the seamen and marines of this country.

You pretty much have to be bad at it [stand-up] for several years to get good at it, so there's no avoiding embarrassing yourself.