Insects are my secret fear. That's what terrifies me more than anything - insects.

A Madagascar Hissing Roach chasing Jerry Lewis. That would be a really neat treat.

Once you put yourself in the hands of the government, you could end up in Utah.

Life is one big minefield, and the only place that isn't a minefield is the place they make the mines.

Living well and ripping your enemy's still-beating heart out with your bare hands is the best revenge.

You only live once and, usually, not even then.

I don’t think television will ever be perfected until the viewer can press a button and cause whoever is on the screen’s head to explode.

Making people laugh is the lowest form of comedy.

Licorice is the liver of candy.

If there were a Mount Rushmore of American humor, Terry Southern would be the mountain they'd carve it from

The transformation scene, where man is becoming insect and insect has become at least man and beyond that - a flying, godlike, shimmering, diaphanous, beautiful creature.

You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you. That’s where I’ll be waiting.

My father insisted I eat red meat. 'You'll lose your brain without food, ' he said. A meal to him without beef was starvation.

You can live your life angry, bitter, mad at somebody or even guilty, not letting go of your own mistakes, but you won't receive the good things God has in store.

Writing poetry is the hard manual labor of the imagination.

Nature, so far as in her lies, imitates God.

Film is shot in fragments, and the same moments can be shot again and again until the director is satisfied.

I have never been able to soothe myself with the sugary delusions of religion; for these things stand convicted of the utmost absurdity in light of modern scientific knowledge.

Grief changes shape, but it never ends. People have a misconception that you can deal with it and say, 'It's gone, and I'm better.' They're wrong.

Liberty may be of no more use Than stirring up the flame of civil wars; Then, by disorder fatal to the world, One wants no king, the other wants no equal.

How do you know there’s not a door to heaven in the sky between Malaysia and Vietnam?