Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

I would offer congratulations were it not for this tentacle gripping my leg.

Normally, she would never wish a head injury on anyone, but it might make her days in Archival Studies a bit easier.

Simplicity gives you the power of freedom.Kindness gives you the power of boldness.Humility gives you the power of acceptance.

The need for control always comes from someone that has lost it.

The human heart as modern civilization has made it is more prone to hatred than to friendship. And it is prone to hatred because it is dissatisfied.

In the distant future, I don't want to be remembered; I want to remember!

Master Seneca says that 'No one can wear a mask for very long.' This is true; but someone can wear different masks for very long!

The sardines had their heads on and they were like watching you.

The first tattoo I got was when I was 17, and it's a cross on my bicep with 'Only God Can Judge Me' underneath.

History with its flickering lamp stumbles along the trail of the past, trying to reconstruct its scenes, to revive its echoes, and kindle with pale gleams the passion of former days.