Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?

If I do marry, I'll expect a pretty serious dowry. I'm talking goats, pigs, chickens, the works.

Life is what you make of it, unless you have tourette's, in which case much becomes involuntary.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Cupcakes are the tattooed brunette chick of the baked goods world.

Love is a crocodile just above the water line waiting to attack the innocent herbivore of my freedom.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Happiness is a carnival game. It's never as easy as it looks, but the dumb ones always seem to be walking around with a big stuffed animal.

It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.

Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.

Spike (to Giles) : Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes — 'Cuppa tea, cuppa tea... almost got shagged... cuppa tea'?

Then again, I was never any good at plumbing the depths of a woman's heart.

Optimism doesn't wait on facts. It deals with prospects. Pessimism is a waste of time.

It's sad when you say a $30 million film is an inexpensive film, but it is.

No one is more dangerously insane than one who is sane all the time: he is like a steel bridge without flexibility, and the order of his life is rigid and brittle.

What else is there to write about than love and loss?

It's fun to watch a true-blue movie star at work. They're really unbelievably charismatic. They understand camera angles.

We must first pray, that God would make us wise; before we can wish, he would make us happy.

I was born in Connecticut. But my parents brought my sister and I to L.A. when-Hollywood, actually, when i was 6 months old.

I have a hard time believing athletes are overpriced. If an owner is losing money, give it up. It's a business. I have trouble figuring out why owners would stay in if they're losing money.