Is it normal to make a minute-to-minute schedule for the timing of thanksgiving? I'm asking for a friend.

I went to drama school at NYU for serious acting. So I was doing Chekov and Sam Shepard plays.

It's always great to get to do what you love and to do something that hopefully people will see and love.

Life is the one thing you cannot get out of alive.

To clarify, the issue isn’t that I’m too fat, it’s that I’m too phat. Can I get a WHAT-WHAT!

I guess funny people are attracted to funny people, and then you get comedy marriages.

I have never turned to my girlfriend and said, Oh, okay, babe, and I see it in scripts all the time.

At my wedding, I was dancing so furiously that I fell hard on my kneecaps. The next morning, my knees were so swollen that I had to get a wheelchair at the airport to go on my honeymoon.

Pageants are already ridiculous and sad, I think.

What I think is funny is when people, despite tragic situations, are still hopeful, still trying. It's sweet and sad - and, to me, hilarious.

It is the artist who realizes that there is a supreme force above him and works gladly away as a small apprentice under God's heaven.

The great corporations of this country were not founded by ordinary people. They were founded by people with extraordinary intelligence, ambition, and aggressiveness.

Don't make a different meal for every person, but make buildable meals. And, I do this with my kids, try to expand their palates gently.

I went from my mother to my wife. And to this day, I can't bear to be alone.

I thought how tenuous the links were between mother and children between friends family things you think are eternal. Everything could be lost more easily than anyone could imagine.

Leaving feels good and pure only when you leave something important, something that mattered to you. Pulling life out by the roots. But you can't do that until your life has grown roots.

January has only one thing to be said for it: it is followed by February. Nothing so well becomes its passing.

Making a movie is universal. Directing a movie is universal; it's a universal language.

Being dead will be no different from being unborn -- I shall be just as I was in the time of William the Conqueror or the dinosaurs or the trilobites. There is nothing to fear in that.

I took my writing seriously, and it seemed to pay off.