Isn't it sad how some people's grip on their lives is so precarious that they'll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?

Reality continues to ruin my life.

I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.

I have all these great genes, but they're recessive. That's the problem here.

Calvin: Why are you crying mom?Mom: I'm cutting up an onion.Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.

I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.-Calvin

I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long.

Calvin : There's no problem so awful, that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse.

Reminiscent of a diamond, she is gifted, privileged, and positioned to glisten.

You can't protect him from being hurt, babe, no mattter what you do. Being vulnerable, letting people in, getting hurt...it's all a part of being in love.

No matter how old you are, no matter how much you weigh, you can still control the health of your body.

I think kids ought to travel. I think it's very good to carry kids around. It's good for them. Of course it's tough on the parents.

School is practice for the future, and practice makes perfect. But nobody's perfect, so why practice?

Whatever you can become will ultimately be destroyed. Only what you already are can't be taken away.

It's tough in the NHL; you have to produce on a high level. And everybody expects you to do it because you make a lot of money. And I never minded it. I always want to be that guy.

I like girls who are cute and naturally funny. As long as they are not too high-maintenance, then we're good.

It is, of course, one of the miracles of science that the germs that used to be in our food have been replaced by poisons.

After so many years of whispery, DIY vocals, there's this new generation of voices that are really starting to burst through the seams.