It ain't the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it's the parts that I do understand.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Never regret anything that made you smile.

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

He who is brave is free

Life's too awesome to waste your time thinking about someone who doesn't treat you right.

Morality is doing what is right regardless of what you are told. Obedience is doing what is told regardless of what is right.

The race to which we belong is the most arrogant and rapacious the most exclusive and indomitable in history. All other races have been its enemies or its victims.

Lovers, of course, are notoriously frantic epistemologists, second only to paranoiacs (and analysts) as readers of signs and wonders.

I've always been aware of having feelings that were pretty intense at times. I imagine most people have had that, or they wouldn't be human.

You cannot be completely nice. It's impossible. Who is it? Who is the perfect guy? Show him to me! It doesn't exist. And thank god.

Life is always rich, thought only occasionally so.

Don't give up. Normally it is the last key on the ring which opens the door.

I think people enjoy finding out something genuinely new.