It all started with a badly timed bald joke!

I'm handsome, no ands, buts or ifs.

We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out.

Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!

For as long as I can remember, I've had memories.

Wives live longer than husbands because they're not married to women.

Did you know that..........'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me

This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.

Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin!

Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. It's not like the sheep was underage.

Live your life in such a way that when you die, you're the one smiling and everyone around you is crying

That Quantity that is sufficient, the Stomach can perfectly concoct and digest, and it sufficeth the due Nourishment of the Body.

Love beauty it is the shadow of God on the universe

Now that we have learned to fly the air like birds, swim under water like fish, we lack one thing - to learn to live on earth as human beings.

Does killing time damage eternity?

Remember that the reader's attention is yours for only a single instant. They will not use up their valuable time trying to figure out what you mean.

One just principle from the depths of a cave is more powerful than an army.

Drugs bring in guns. They bring in all these black-on-black crimes.

Bigotry is the disease of ignorance.

You can't always measure the effects of activist work; you just have to wish and pray that the message gets through.