It has been my experience that the people I judge most harshly are the ones in whom I recognize some part of myself.

The frustration of being marginalized often gets misdirected at the most visible members of one's own community, because they are more accessible than the real agents of marginalization.

Abandonment by a lover won't kill us. But it awakens the parts of us that remember when it could.

Anyone who makes a life of what they love is a hero to me, and it's important for those people to be visible in every kind of life, every kind of love, every kind of work.

New York at night, from its bridges, is a miracle. When I first came to the city, it took all my fantasies and set them on fire, turned them into flickering constellations of light.

You don't have to write like David Foster Wallace or James Baldwin or Maggie Nelson - indeed, you shouldn't. Those writers are doing it better than you ever could.

I can still discern people's weaknesses, but it doesn't make me want to exploit them; it makes me want to hug them.

Torch songs are confessions. They are an expression of feeling that cannot be concealed or contained or minimized. They are marked by anguish, yes, but also by yielding.

The craft work becomes a mediator between me and my secrets, between me and the listener.

Letting go of the cozy stories you've been carrying around is devastating. But there's more room for new stuff after you do it.

Being celibate was so wonderful. It taught me a lot about love, but even more about my own self outside of love. I'd never met myself out of love before, really.

Trust undone will lead to heartache and pain. So I ask you to be honest and truthful in your love for me.

Some things have a natural way of solving themselves. Sometimes you just have to let it go and observe it get solved.

We are so constituted that we can gain intense pleasure only from the contrast, and only very little from the condition itself.

No matter how much we think about something, in the end, the decision is made on how we feel.

It is impossible to lose your footing while on your knees.

The unconscious can become destructive if it is disregarded and thwarted.

I darted a contemptuous look at the stately models of superstition.

An unexamined faith is not worth having, for it can be true only by accident.

I live in an atmosphere of music.

Important reminder: It's not fair of you to demand more proof of Christians for their beliefs than you demand for your own.